Intimacy With Jesus

I struggle so much with setting aside time for my heavenly Husband. The busier I get the less time I have for Him. I've been working a lot of overtime lately. My job is physical labor so extra hours means added strain on my body. I find that needing rest or a good night's sleep is critical to me at this point while working so much. And of course there are still things that have to get done like housework, laundry, grocery shopping, cooking, running errands and preparing my Sunday lessons. For those of you with spouses and children, your list is even longer. So where does God fit in? Is it about making time for Him? I believe that if I am thinking about it in those terms, then I am missing the whole point of a relationship with the King of kings and Lords of lords; the Lover of my soul. When is the last time you ever heard of someone in the relationship to beat all relationships having to "make time" for that other person? When you are in love, and it is a new love with all the excitement of that beginning, you gladly give your time to it and wish that you had even more. Everything else sort of gets pushed to the back burner and things even fall by the wayside in order to have more time with that person who has captured your heart. You can hardly wait to be with them, or to hear their voice. You live in anticipation of the next time you will be in their presence. Nothing else compares to it and nothing captivates your heart and your thoughts like that special someone. When you are with them, you are not contemplating your grocery list or thinking about getting your oil changed in your car. You give them your undivided attention. There isn't another soul on earth who holds a candle to them and the rest of the world seems a little grayer when they're not around. Get the picture? Who hasn't experienced that at one time or another in life, whether it be your first love or the spouse who captured your heart all those years ago.
Jesus wants more. Jesus deserves more. Everything I've described doesn't even begin to compare with an intimate relationship with the One who spoke and created the very stars that you look at when sitting on a porch swing with your sweetheart. And when you start to cultivate that kind of relationship with your Shepherd, everything else will pale in comparison. Nothing else will ever satisfy like the Lord Jesus Christ. He is joy in abundance! He is love like that which can't even be described. He is peace that surpasses all understanding. (Phil. 4:7) He is warmth that you won't even feel wrapped up with your honey, sitting in front of a fireplace on a cold night. The spiritual touch of His hand and compassion in His eyes is unlike anything you've had from another flesh and bone body.
So why is it so hard then to make time for my Husband? Why do I sometimes still look at it in those terms of having to fit Him into my schedule? How that must grieve the One whose heart has beat for mine from all eternity past! I can't even imagine how it must hurt Him to look into my heart and know that sometimes I don't even WANT to make time for Him. Sometimes I just feel so tired, my body so weary. Sometimes the pain in my body keeps me from even wanting to look up and smile at my Savior. There are days when I want to sleep an extra hour instead of getting up and giving myself completely to the One who died for me so that I COULD enjoy that relationship with Him. I have days when I want another hot cup of tea more than I want to get on my face and worship Him. Do you ever plan to make time for Jesus and then just run out of time because you spent His time on other things like deciding to spend a little extra time playing around on Facebook? I have been guilty of that. I'll have 2 hours set aside for prayer, reading my bible and devotionals, and just talking to Jesus and sharing my heart. Then next thing I know, an hour has gone by because I was reading posts on Facebook. So then I start taking things off my relationship list. The most important relationship I will have for all eternity, with the Lord of glory, and I decide that time with Him isn't as important as reading my devotionals. Or I choose those books over my bible some days when I have cut my time too short. Poor choices. Or else I had set aside time the day before to cook so that I wouldn't have to the next day before work and I blow that time, so then the thing that gets canceled is time with Jesus! Pitiful, so very sad! If I truly prized Him like I should and like He deserves, I would never ever substitute something else for spending time worshipping Him and praying to my wonderful Father! Never. It shows just how little I get it. Still, after 6 1/2 years of salvation, I haven't even scratched the surface of understanding the importance of my relationship with my Savior. If I were in right relationship with Jesus, as He would have me be, I would crave nothing as much as spending time getting to know Him. I would want to share my heart and life with nobody else in the world as much as Him. I wouldn't look for pleasure in this world because it would all seem empty compared to being bonded intimately with my Husband. I run out of time while getting ready for work and I actually walk out the door without even telling Him how much I love Him. I neglect to speak of my adoration for Him. But how empty would it be to speak those things of love and devotion to my God if my actions speak even louder that I really don't care near as much as I should? He knows my heart and my life service is much more important to Him than my lip service. I need His grace every single day in even beginning to give Him worship. I have to plead constantly for the grace and strength to live my life before my God in a manner pleasing to Him. The thing for me to understand though is that in my own flesh and my own strength, it will never be possible. But with God, all things are possible. (Matthew 19:26) Beloved, do you have any of these same struggles? God knows about them and He cares. Did you know that even the desire to cultivate a right relationship with your King comes from God? If left to ourselves, we would never desire Him. It's the work of the Holy Spirit in you. If your relationship with Jesus is lacking, seek His face. Plead at the throne room of grace and mercy. God will never turn away such humble desires. He will grow your relationship with your Husband if you will only seek His face. Never stop pleading. Never stop knocking. He will become to you, if you will only turn to Him, everything your heart could ever desire.